Monday, August 29, 2011

Individualized Education Plan: Lunatic Autism Mom

Individualized Education Plan (IEP)
Name: Maggie (aka: Lunatic Autism Mom)
Agency: House on the hill, the one with the weeds in the flower beds.
IEP Team Meeting Date: 08/29/11

Participants: Maggie (mom); Rob (hubbie); Cam (ASD kid #1); Adam (ASD kid #2)

Eligibility: C-Section 2001 & 2004; ASD Diagnosis 2004 & 2007

Primary Disability: Autism Induced Lunacy (AIL)

Supplementary Aids, Services, Supports: Medication as prescribed, Weekly Sanity Checks with a professional, Spousal Support, YMCA, Husband's Salary.


Goal #1
The Lunatic Autism Mom will keep everything in the calendar most at her disposal (phone) and will synch it to the household electronic calendar at least weekly.
by: 9/1/11
Resources to help meet this goal: This will be coordinated through the support of helpful hubby in ensuring that the technology "talks" to one another and by keeping the phone at hand at all times.
**This goal is 99% completed**

Goal #2 
The Lunatic Autism Mom will stay home one full day per week with the exception of driving the kids to and from school, no exceptions will be made for any reason.
by: 10/1/11
Resources to help meet this goal: Lunatic Autism Mom will chose one day per week, prior to that week, and will schedule that as her HOME day. She will not brush her hair, will wear sweats or pjs to school drop off and will, in general, be too embarassed at her attire and appearance to step foot out of her car. This day can be spent accomplishing long over-due tasks (painting), catching up on housework (laundry) or allowing herself to be sick when the fever is over 99.9 degrees (sleep).
**Week 1 HOME day is currently scheduled!**

Goal #3
The Lunatic Autism Mom needs more energy and needs to get in shape.
by: 9/1/11
Resources to help meet this goal: Lunatic Autism Mom has hired a trainer to literally kick her ass into shape. She will meet with said trainer 2 times per week for a minimum of 10 sessions with the option to increase her sessions to 20. She will not stress over the cost of this trainer and will not cry at the assessment appointment since"you have to start somewhere".
**Assessment this Thursday, please pray for me.**

Goal #4
The Lunatic Autism Mom will schedule fun and relaxing things during school hours at a minimum of one per week.
by: 9/1/11
Resources to help meet this goal: The primary resource will be wonderfully supportive and caring hubby's paycheck. Occasional weeks might allow for a 1 hour relaxation massage and other weeks might allow for a guilt free hour of silence at the local library. In between, the Lunatic Autism Mom will try not to skip hair cuts and will not allow her gray roots to grow to obviousness (as they are now). The Lunatic Autism Mom will "put her money where her mouth is" and take care of everyone in her family including herself.
**Seriously, I am 35 and have a full head of gray hair. I've been dying it since I was 16, bad genes I guess. How does one acquire that casual, classic, youthful, silver gray bob that looks so good on the models in JJill and Lands End Catalog? I would totally consider letting it go if I knew I could look like that in the end!**

Goal #5 (the final goal)
The Lunatic Autism Mom would like to learn something new this year. Something new could be kayaking, a foreign language, standing board paddling, snowboarding/skiing or visiting local museums for general knowledge.
by: the end of the school year
Resources to help meet this goal: the entire Smithsonian, various lakes and the Chesapeake Bay, the local library, Liberty Mountain and the kindness and support of handsome hubby to chillax with the boys during the hours that learning this new skill cannot be accomplished during school hours.
** Yeah like I need another hobby, I'm a big time crafter but I want to learn something not crafty, more active and something that I could eventually share with my boys once I understand the mechanics myself. **

Assessment report due: 01/01/12

In the immortal words of a person who never existed (and didn't fully understand correct grammar):


Monday, August 22, 2011

Long time... no post... Lets talk cars!

Today I am running errands with my two boys and they HATE running errands with a hot a burning passion. I notice my TPMS light has come on again (tire pressure monitoring system) and this leads me to a very lengthy and quite topsy turvy all together curvy thought process about vehicles and why we drive what we do.

I have a minivan, I know shocked right? Mother of two Autistic boys and I drive a minivan. Do I like my van? Yes. Do I like driving my van? Heck no! It's a van! Quite arguably the most convenient yet boring vehicle on the planet!  But here's the thing, it's a Honda Odyssey and if you have to drive a minivan this is totally the way to go! It's a great van, very roomy, very convenient and the perfect accompaniment to the insane life of an Autism Mom. For example the TPMS light, it is telling me that my tire is low on air. Thank you TMPS light, I never ever think to check the air pressure and usually rely on my oil change place to do it for me. Speaking of which, there's a light for that too! Right now that light is telling me that it's almost time for an oil change which I am totally going to put off until school starts back up again. I absolutely cannot forget about the Variable Engine, I drive ridiculous mileage (122,215 miles to date) and when I am driving on the highway the engine will cut back to 3 cylinders to save on gas. This is a much needed and very appreciated feature.

I file all of this under the heading, "will save your sanity" but as I bought this van in 2008 it is still lacking in more sanity saving features, the first being bluetooth. I've had to add a Jabbra bluetooth speaker to the van to compensate. The month AFTER my van was built, they added bluetooth. Drat! The next model year they added power jacks to the second row of seats... I would KILL for power jacks to fuel the boys DS systems! Lastly, I hear rumors that some radios actually act like MP3 players. My friend, Andrew just bought a total bachelor car that does this and I WANT!!!! Not that the 6-CD changer isn't great and all but to only have to deal with the CD once and then never again? Heaven.

I traveled to the beach this weekend with the family, I drove and changed CDs, I drove and plugged and unplugged power cables, I drove and watched the TPMS light come on, I drove and I drove and I am starting to think that the type of car you have isn't as important as what features it offers. I think there may come a day where the final straw to push me right into insanity might just fall within the doors and wheels of my vehicle. I'm guessing I will be attempting to change a CD, plug in a power cable and my phone is going to ring at the same time as I am running late for an appointment with a specialist in Baltimore. It's just a guess but I think it's a pretty sure bet.

Just in case you are wondering... yes, I have a Minivan Step-Down Plan. After two Honda Odyssey vans I feel I have put in my mini-van driving time but to go to a car (even a big one) would be a shock to the system. In between there should be something van-like but not actually a van... in my dreams I see this: